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This is a first part of the Guide: How To Change Your Life

Welcome.

You're here because you want to transform your life.
This page will explain who is this guide for, what you can get from applying it, how it works, and what you have to do to get the best results.

Let's get to it.

Life transformation is about altering your life circumstances and actions to align with who you are, your needsPhysiological needs are the things we need to survive (food, water, air, etc.).
Psychological needs are the things we need to thrive (certainty, significance, connection, etc.).
The importance of each need shifts based on the situat... and valuesPersonal values are our view of how the world should function. They are (just like our personal beliefs) created especially during our early development years. They are updated (reinforced or replaced) through our life experiences and inten....

Contrary to most advice in the Personal Growth industry, I believe that you shouldn’t try to change who you are. Exactly opposite. You should find out who you are and transform your current life situation to bring out your true and whole self —your unique blend of gifts and personality— into the world.

I believe that the purpose of your life is to be you.

Using the Tree of Life Quest frameworkCreate a life of satisfaction, joy and abundance by applying the simple principles of tree growth to your life. Focus on environment and nutrition, grow naturally. to transform your life enables you to be true to yourself, enjoy your life, and at the same time give your best to those around you.

How? By taking back your life.

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Taking back your life
Footnotes
What’s next?

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! Important !
I will try to include as much information as possible in the main article, however, for the clarity of text, some parts will be either in Footnotes or linked by tooltipsOn touchscreens, you have to touch (or click) the tooltip to see additional information. On regular screens, you can hover over the link with the mouse to see the tooltip. When you click on the link on regular screens, it will open the page.... Please test your access to tooltipsOn touchscreens, you have to touch (or click) the tooltip to see additional information. On regular screens, you can hover over the link with the mouse to see the tooltip. When you click on the link on regular screens, it will open the page.... Hover with your mouse over this linkOn touchscreens, you have to touch (or click) the tooltip to see additional information. On regular screens, you can hover over the link with the mouse to see the tooltip. When you click on the link on regular screens, it will open the page.... If nothing happened, you probably have a touchscreen device, please touch (or click) the link to see the tooltip.

Taking back your life

It all starts with your mind.

From around the age of one year, we are bombarded with requirements and expectations. Some are good (e.g. you shall not harm others) but most are designed to mould us into uniformity, chasing the same goals and believing whatever we are told is THE truth. And often even the good is distorted and its meaning is changed into the exact opposite.

You might be told that you have to be strong, independent, and decisive. But what if your soul longs to be caring, nurturing, and supportive? What if you are told to be quiet, obedient, and submissive but you want to challenge, contest, and triumph? If you are told that you can never succeed because of how society works, is it true or is it to prevent you from trying?

Those and other questions are important. They open never-looked-behind doors in your soul. You uncover hidden things about yourself. The truth is what sets us free. But the truth doesn’t shout in your face. It knocks and waits for you to open and start a quiet conversation.

By following this guide you will uncover who you are, what is the purpose of your life, what is your missionYour Mission refers to Your Impact on the world; your actions. Three parts of the Mission are:
1. Care - be the keeper of your brother, not like Kain
2. Creation - bringing things which were not into being
3. Cultivation - keeping ..., what are your strengths and weaknesses, and how you can use them to your advantage.

But don’t expect me to tell you all of this. That’s not my job. My only role is to help you to ask yourself the right questions. You will have to find the answers inside your soul.

Because no one can tell you who you are.
You must discover it yourself.

What will you get?

Clarity and understanding: When you dig deep into your soul, you uncover all kinds of things about yourself. The first ones will be your NeedsPhysiological needs are the things we need to survive (food, water, air, etc.).
Psychological needs are the things we need to thrive (certainty, significance, connection, etc.).
The importance of each need shifts based on the situat... and ValuesPersonal values are our view of how the world should function. They are (just like our personal beliefs) created especially during our early development years. They are updated (reinforced or replaced) through our life experiences and inten.... Some of them you kinda knew, but some will become a surprise.

Forgiveness and self-acceptance: We cannot hate what we understand. When you understand why you do certain things, you accept who you are. When you accept who you are, you stop blaming yourself for what you saw as “failures”. You review and (if needed) amend your BeliefsPersonal beliefs are our view of how the world really functions. They are (just like our personal values) created especially during our early development years. Personal beliefs are updated (reinforced or replaced) through our experiences a... and AttitudesYour Attitude is the way how you approach a situation. It is the internal mindset, however, it can be shown in an outer display of your emotions. Check How Needs, Values, Beliefs, and Attitudes Impact our Behaviour to see the interaction be... towards yourself and others.

Harmony and balance: The Tree of Life Quest FrameworkCreate a life of satisfaction, joy and abundance by applying the simple principles of tree growth to your life. Focus on environment and nutrition, grow naturally. encompasses the whole life, not just some parts of it. Following the guide enables you to interconnect all life areas.

Being in control: When you are done with your Life Vision, you will know exactly how you want your life to look in every area of your life. Expanding your vision into Life Plan with specific Milestones —Habits to create, Skills to learn, Actions to take, etc.— will enable you to know exactly where you are and what you should focus on next. Thanks to this Roadmap you will never feel lost again.

Ability to decide (with a cheat sheet): Facing a dilemma, you will have an easy way to decide. The answers on your Value Cards will be your North Star helping you to navigate life-changing decisions.

Stability: How you do anything is how you do everything. You will choose and create a set of Seven Sacred Habits. They will be the foundation of your actions. Whatever will happen in your life, whatever setback or disaster will strike, you will never start from zero again. You will always be able to restart and rebuild your life starting from those seven habits.

What will you get?

Clarity and understanding: When you dig deep into your soul, you uncover all kinds of things about yourself. The first ones will be your NeedsPhysiological needs are the things we need to survive (food, water, air, etc.).
Psychological needs are the things we need to thrive (certainty, significance, connection, etc.).
The importance of each need shifts based on the situat... and ValuesPersonal values are our view of how the world should function. They are (just like our personal beliefs) created especially during our early development years. They are updated (reinforced or replaced) through our life experiences and inten.... Some of them you kinda knew, but some will become a surprise.

Forgiveness and self-acceptance: We cannot hate what we understand. When you understand why you do certain things, you accept who you are. When you accept who you are, you stop blaming yourself for what you saw as “failures”. You review and (if needed) amend your BeliefsPersonal beliefs are our view of how the world really functions. They are (just like our personal values) created especially during our early development years. Personal beliefs are updated (reinforced or replaced) through our experiences a... and AttitudesYour Attitude is the way how you approach a situation. It is the internal mindset, however, it can be shown in an outer display of your emotions. Check How Needs, Values, Beliefs, and Attitudes Impact our Behaviour to see the interaction be... towards yourself and others.

Harmony and balance: The Tree of Life Quest encompasses the whole life, not just some parts of it. Following the guide enables you to interconnect all life areas.

Being in control: When you are done with your Life Vision, you will know exactly how you want your life to look in every area of your life. Expanding your vision into Life Plan with specific Milestones —Habits to create, Skills to learn, Actions to take, etc.— will enable you to know exactly where you are and what you should focus on next. Thanks to this Roadmap you will never feel lost again.

Ability to decide (with a cheat sheet): Facing a dilemma, you will have an easy way to decide. The answers on your Value Cards will be your North Star helping you to navigate life-changing decisions.

Stability: How you do anything is how you do everything. You will choose and create a set of Seven Sacred Habits. They will be the foundation of your actions. Whatever will happen in your life, whatever setback or disaster will strike, you will never start from zero again. You will always be able to restart and rebuild your life starting from those seven habits.

Can you transform your life?

It depends.

Every person has the ability and opportunity to transform their life, but not every person can do it.
In my experience, there are three requirements for life transformation. If you don’t meet them, you are highly unlikely to achieve the transformation.

To change your life effectively, there are three prerequisites:

1) Take responsibility. This is often controversial. It shouldn’t be. It simply means that you have to believe that a change is possible and you can do something about it. If you blame everyone and everything except yourself for your situation, you cannot experience positive change. (See point 2. for more info on negative change.)

What I mean by that is, you have to be willing to look at yourself without a biased perspective and without shaming or blaming yourself. In other words, you must be honest with yourself. The fact is that in every situation there are things you can do. They might seem insignificant. But nevertheless, you can do them. And many small things lead to big changes.

2) Take action. You either grow or decay. That’s a fact. Change is inevitable. The law of entropy states, that without outside effort everything decays. Negative change occurs automatically. Positive change takes effort. So you have to be willing to put effort into growth. Have a desire for action. Thinking about changes is not enough. You must do things.

3) Be true to yourself. You are enough. The biggest regret of dying people is living life expected of them instead of being true to themselves. 1

If you are fish you can’t climb a tree and as a squirrel, you can’t swim. As a human, you can try to do things against your nature but you will be bad at it and it will feel forced. Lasting changes are based on things you care about and have a natural proclivity for.

And that means that I cannot tell you if you can change your life. YOU have to answer this question yourself: Can you transform your life? Do you have what it takes?

PS: I delve into this deeper in the Four Levels of Life Awareness.

What do I mean by “changing life”?

As I said before, changing life doesn’t mean changing you.

I cringe when I hear people say that you have to decide what kind of person you want to be and then change yourself into that person. I know that they mean well. But it implies that you are flawed and you must change yourself. Nothing is further from the truth.

You are enough.

If it seems like you failed at your life, chances are that you either lack something to function properly or you are trying to be someone you are not because you don’t know who you really are.

If you buy a smartphone and you don’t put in the SIM card, you cannot make calls. You can connect it to WiFi and use it as a tablet or laptop to browse the internet. Here’s the problem. When you get out of the WiFi range, it will stop working.

But it’s still a phone. Put in the SIM card and a whole spectrum of new opportunities will open up. Including the ability to make calls and connect to the internet.

You are such a phone. Don’t try to be a laptop. Find out who you are and what you need. Get what you are missing (the “SIM card”) and your life will change. It is not about changing you.

Changing life means being you; finding out who you are, what your needs are, and living to your full potential.

Are there different ways to change life?

Yes.

There are many different programs aimed at different areas of life. You can focus solely on your finances. Or on your relationships. Each such program will help you in one area, however, it may hurt your life in other areas. Don’t take me wrong. There are some excellent programs focused on specific areas. And they are perfect for what they do. I used them too. But they are not fit for life transformation.

My approach is holistic.

We take it slowly at the start.
We explore who you are, your past and present to discover your Needs and your Values.
You will create your Values Cards —a cheat sheet tool you can use when making life-altering decisions.
Then we look into the future and form a balanced Life Vision encompassing Six Life Areas.

The next step will be to examine your Beliefs, Attitudes, Abilities, Skills, and Habits.
By comparing your Life Vision —where you want to go— and where you are now we will identify the goals to pursue and turn them into Milestones on a Roadmap of your life journey —your Life plan.
Your Life Plan is a tool you will use to monitor your progress; where you are and what you will focus on next.

The programs aimed at the specific life areas I mentioned above? Now will be time to decide if and which you need. When you know where you are heading it is much easier to select the correct vehicle to get there. That’s why creating the Roadmap first will make your journey easier and more enjoyable.

It’s up to you if you want to start working on your life by patching up a specific area of your life. In my opinion, it is like trying to remodel the kitchen in a house with structural problems and a leaking roof.

Starting with Life Plan ensures that the house is sound before you start working on that kitchen.

What is the difference between Life Vision and a Life Plan?

The Life Vision is an overall description of your life based on who you are. It lists the things important to you — your Needs and your Values. It doesn’t list specific actions. Rather it defines the internal foundations of who you are. It’s your Declaration of Independence, your Magna Carta. The Founding Document of your life.

The Life Plan is about actions. It describes how you will bring your Life Vision into the world. Here you will plan the Milestones —Goals you want to achieve, Habits you want to create, Skills to learn, etc.

Creating your Life Vision and turning it into a Life Plan is an important first step on your life journey.

Both are of course subject to revision. During your lifetime, you will go through different Seasons and you will encounter all sorts of Weather. Something you deemed important a few years ago is not important anymore because you have grown or your life circumstances changed. Over time the seasons change, new opportunities and new barriers pop up and you will have to account for them as well.

The periodical review keeps you true to yourself. Checking how you’ve grown and where you are gives you the opportunity to adjust your Milestones, your Actions and Habits to fit your new size and the different Seasons of your life.

I personally review my Life Vision once a year and the Milestones of my Life Plan every six months, but you will create your schedule.

How my program of life transformation works

To guide you on the way, I will use my Tree of Life Quest FrameworkCreate a life of satisfaction, joy and abundance by applying the simple principles of tree growth to your life. Focus on environment and nutrition, grow naturally.. It’s a comprehensive philosophy based on time-tested tools and strategies. They proved successful in my own and others’ lives. While the structure is unique, lots of the tools and strategies were devised and shared by many people through the centuries.²

Unlike personal coaching, where I can ask direct questions and tailor advice depending on your responses, this self-guided program requires introspection from you.

You will need a pen and paper.³ Do not trust your memory, however good it might be. It’s proven that physically transferring your thoughts on paper helps to gain clarity and follow through on the desired outcome.

Life transformation requires work. It is not for everyone.

You will have to think a lot – question yourself, find answers within, and determine your actions.
You will also have to take action. Both, thinking and doing, are crucial for a change to happen.

If you don’t want to do that, this guide is not for you.
Discover How To Change Your Life; Lubo @TreeOfLifeQuest

Footnotes

¹ The Top Five Regrets of the Dying by Bronnie Ware

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² During the years I discovered many different tools and tips. They are a collection from many different sources – books, articles, videos, podcasts, etc. I never kept a record of where I learned what, so in many cases, I wouldn’t be able to credit the correct person. Especially if in the meantime something became a mainstream item used by many people. I will try my best.

Return to the article.

³ I suggest the use of a ring binder. In the guide, you will find printable templates etc. so it will be easier for you to add them to your folder.

Return to the article.

What’s next?

In the next article, Five Steps to Transform Your LifeThere are five steps to reshape your life: discover ~> define ~> design ~> do ~> debug. Below I explain those steps and include Personal examples from my own transformation journey., I will explain the 5D process we will use to create your Life Plan.

Next: Five Steps to Transform Your Life

Image sources:

Blackboard with text Your life matters: Image by Brett Sayles from Pexels | Pexels License

⌵ ON THIS PAGE ⌵(click to open/close)

Taking back your life

It all starts with your mind.

What will you get?

What will you get?

Can you transform your life?

What do I mean by “changing life”?

Are there different ways to change life?

What is the difference between Life Vision and a Life Plan?

How my program of life transformation works

Footnotes

What’s next?

⌵ ON THIS PAGE ⌵
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