19 January 2023


How two three-letter words changed my life

A tiny change with a massive impact.

This change I made in my life might have been the smallest one. But its impact? Explosive. It changed everything.

I don't remember where I got that idea from. But whoever planted it in my mind deserves a medal.

What change did I make, you ask? I switched one three-letter word and added one three-letter word to my vocabulary. That's it. Two three-letter words helped me to change my life. And they can help you too.

The words are 'how' and 'yet'.

How it works

Let's start with 'how'.
Not all questions are created equal. How I formulate questions determines the resulting answers.

When I asked myself, "Why can I never do the right thing?" the answer was obvious: "Because you're a loser."

But when I swiped the 'why' for 'how', I received a very different answer. "How can I do the right thing?" resulted in "You can do A or B."

Use of 'how' instead of 'why' opened new options. My ability to find solutions grew with the right questions. To change things, I didn't need to know everything. I needed to ask better questions. When I started to ask questions with 'how', I was able to find solutions and fix many problems in my life. Did I solve all problems in my life? Of course not. There are still things I haven't been able to solve. Yet.

'Yet' is the second three-lettered word which changed my life.

I used to say a lot of things limiting what I was able to do.

"I can't do ...",
"I don't know how...",

After these statements, my mind didn't look for a solution. When I said, "I cannot do that", the case was closed.
But when I added the word 'yet', its dynamic changed.

"I can't do this. Yet."
"I don't know how. Yet."

The word 'yet' adds possibility. Suddenly, my mind opened to a different outcome. The current state of my abilities or knowledge didn't restrict me. Everything could change.

The highest impact came when I combined both words. Here is an example. Before I started writing the 'think. act. grow.' newsletter, I worried about my abilities.

"I cannot write a good enough newsletter for people to read it."

Which was true. But I added 'yet' and asked 'how'.

"I cannot write a good enough newsletter yet. How can I learn to write an engaging newsletter?"

Thanks to this change, I have found many answers, which I am now putting in place.

Why does it work?

Words have power.
An immense power
I mean, a HUGE power

Most people don't realise how immense that power is.

You might have heard an expression: "A lie repeated a hundred times becomes the truth." And, in a sense, this is a fact. Of course, the lie will not become an objective truth. But it will become true for the person subjected to it. And it can destroy the whole life.

A child repeatedly told: "You cannot do anything right." will soon start to believe it. Especially if the person saying that is someone close or someone with authority. When repeated enough times, the child will accept it as a fact. The child will be afraid to try anything new. And every ---even the tiniest--- failure will reinforce the "I cannot do anything right." belief.

The most damaging words are those we tell ourselves.

Fortunately, there is a cure. A truth repeated enough times will replace the internalised lie. And it doesn't have to be a complex statement or some daily chanted mantra. In my case, I adopted two short words. They changed how I view myself and how I solve problems.

What do you think?

One of the answers to my newsletter question was "ask for feedback from readers". So I would love to hear from you. Is the content relevant? Does it help you in your life? Is the writing clear and easy to understand?

Also, if you are facing some situation in your life for which you are looking for tips and tools to solve it, tell me. If I have a tested tool, I will share it.

That's a wrap for today. If you didn't already, give those two words a try. It might surprise you how significant change they can make.

See you next Thursday, and until then: #thinkDOgrow


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